Free.

I can't believe I did it...I actually was in Japan for a week and a half. There were times where it honestly felt like a dream...there was a surreal, lucid quality to the way the fog wrapped around the lush green mountains and rose from the sea. It truly was a feast for the senses, and the experience was a cleansing one, providing me with the clarity I particularly need at this point in my life. There's so much that I already miss: the rush of men clad in business suits through the streets and train stations (they are the modern equivalent of samurai, in many ways), the twinkling music that filled the train cars, the excellent food, the glow of the city lights in the nighttime, the clear, cool streams, the clean smell of the rainfall, being surrounded by curious schoolchildren, getting to use my broken Japanese with the natives, the incredible street fashion, the way time seemed to stand still...I could go on. So many stories to tell and photos to share, but the memories will ring in my mind and my heart forever. This is only the beginning...I fully intend to return someday, hopefully with someone that can enjoy the experience with me.

Punchlist.

5 days until I can book it out of this town for the summer...at long last. I'm starting to get stir crazy. Here's a tentative itinerary/to-do list/wishlist for the long break ahead:

-Trip to Japan! Ten glorious days, starting in Osaka, and from there it's off to Hiroshima, Kyoto, Nara, Kamakura, Hakone, and Tokyo, in that order. I hope to get in some good photos and pick up a few souvenirs, but above all, it's a feast for the mind, the soul, and the senses. I'll always have the photographs in my heart.

-Internship at an architecture firm. I'll be working mainly with the other interior designers, but I'm looking forward to opportunities to speak with the architects and glean some useful tidbits of advice. At this point, I'm open to a bit of change with my career...this co-op experience could tip the scales.

-Weekend trips. The dates and destinations aren't all definite, but I have to work around my co-op (and my weekend job, which I may be asking off more than a few times). NYC may be in the cards (my second visit), and I'm hoping for Pittsburgh as well...but above all, there's one particular trip that I must take. I'll be on my own, but I'm adamant about making it possible...distance is no longer a limiting factor.

-Reading. Free time is going to be a bit crunched, but as long as I can keep some inspirational literature at my disposal, I'll be able to hang onto my sanity.

-Start thinking about/planning my senior project. Sketches, case studies, whatever it takes, I'll need to get a head start if it's going to be done to my satisfaction.

-Learn how to do some real cooking! Perhaps some baking, too...

-Work on some small crafts (provided that I have the time).

-Save and spend wisely. I'll be getting some good money between my co-op and my weekend job, so I can treat myself (most likely to CDs), but I'll definitely be putting the bulk of my money in savings.

-Make time to work out. I'm not horribly out of shape, but exercise would be a good stress relief to balance out my hectic work schedule.

-Be more adventurous. It's the summer of discovery, and a time of (anticipated) great change. Let go.

Autopilot.

13 days until the end of the term, and even the light at the end of the tunnel seems to be flushing out most of the last-minute stress. Granted, it doesn't cause the work to write itself, but as long as I can buckle down for the next few days and get in some solid work time, I'll be just fine. At best, I'll have some free time to play around with at this point next week. For now, it's all about mechanics. There is rarely any sort of emotion to feel these days, not when I'm in eat-sleep-work mode. Moments of joy are few and fleeting, and anything else is just stress-fueled upset or tears over something that doesn't even make sense to begin with. I'm looking forward to a few restful, carefree days at home before leaving on the trip of a lifetime, which I've been preparing for steadily over the past couple of weeks. I'm admittedly put off by the idea of flying, since I haven't been on a plane in over 10 years (and haven't had to face the post-9/11 security lockdowns). I am also somewhat scared of flying overseas, but that can be chalked up to my own paranoia. I'll be in good company, so that should ease some fears...regardless, I plan on taking many (manymanymany) photos, enjoying myself and the company of the other travellers in my group, and immersing myself in what will prove to be a prime cultural experience. Of course, I'd also like to pick up some nice souvenirs for those not lucky enough to be able to tag along. After I return, a few days to catch up from jet lag, and then it's off to my summer co-op at the architectural firm. Optimally, there will be at least a few weekends for quick excursions, whether with family, friends, or maybe even flying (well, driving) solo. My intuition tells me that it's going to be a life-changing summer for sure.

Until I get to the good stuff, though, it's back to writing papers, doing research, and feeding my love (growing into addiction?) for shoegaze. Cheers.