Pause and play.

Having been at home for the past three days, I have been able to enjoy some real peace and quiet for a change...between my last school "break" (which was spent almost entirely at work) and a stressful winter term, I was really feeling the effects. There's a dull, persistent ache that I've been feeling for the past few months, and while it has subsided some, I'm finally going to the doctor to (hopefully) get it figured out and taken care of. It has been far too long since I last felt great...I've had pretty good and good, but not quite great. I'm already a bit tight on money, having gone shopping crazy my first couple of days back home, but I don't regret a single purchase. I spent a good amount of money, but I spent it well. I finally bought my first CD of the year (Vampire Weekend) as well...going almost two months without shopping for music was driving me batty. There was a small victory for me yesterday...after 3 or 4 years of searching, I finally was able to find chrysanthemum tea in a local Korean grocery. I first had it at a tea and noodle shop downtown and was head over heels...now I have some to call my own. Victory tastes pretty sweet...and somewhat floral...and even a bit spicy.

I have also determined that I want to take a little photographic expedition around town...I should know my own city better than I do, and what better way than to stretch my photography muscle? I'll be able to do more of that once the weather improves, but it doesn't hurt to try. Unfortunately, it's been too many years since I last visited the library, and in light of my recent plunge into all things Louise Brooks, I want to read up as much as I can and enlighten myself (Operation: Chasing Brooksie?). Self-enlightenment is the watchword this year, and appropriately so...2008 is the year that I stop existing and start living.

Inner meet me.

If there's one thing I've really been craving lately, it's a strong human connection. To find even one person that I can converse with about any topic...someone that always has something new to bring to the table...that would be a huge thrill. Substance is a big winner with me. One of my co-workers back home seems to fit that description, but accessibility is an issue. We live two completely different lives, yet when I'm finally home from school on breaks, I look forward to seeing him at work and striking up a good exchange. I like to chit-chat with all of my co-workers, but he's the one I spend the most time talking to, though even that time is limited. It's strange, but I get along better with a man 30 years my senior than with most people my own age (though I get along well with just about every person I meet)...we have so much more to discuss than I do with most of my other friends and colleagues. Part of that I may attribute to the fact that I've never felt my own age...always a few years older. I'm curious as to how that attitude will change as I get older myself, as well as how this idea will work out in the realm of romantic relationships. As this winter term winds down and I start to get weary of the daily grind, it's nice to have one spark of hope to cup in my hands.